How to love more and stress less during quarantine is about unpacking your personality. This post looks at romantic coupling through the lens of personalities. We as humans are naturally drawn to people who share opposite personality traits. For example, an extrovert typically seeks an introvert; a judging type seeks a perceiver. People are drawn to what they BELIEVE they lack. The funny thing is we don’t need anything; we are perfectly imperfect, just as we are.
Coupled in quarantine? In these uncommon circumstances, one or both of you may become unglued. Your human. It’s OK. Add-in kids, job loss, or new working conditions, and you’ve got a stew sitting on the stove ready to boil over. Please understand I’m not a psychologist, nor am I speaking to domestic violence or emotional abuse issues.
My upcoming books, Unpacking Your Personality.™️ (16 in all), takes on the topic of romance. Each book covers in detail how-to attract your opposite, a romantic soul journey, compatibility issues, which type is your best romantic partner, your romantic traits, and yes, the best places to visit for your travel personality.
Quarantine + Vacationing: The Similarities
Please know that I’m not ignorant to the fact that being on vacation and being quarantined are not one and the same. What I’m speaking to here are personality type issues between couples. An understanding of one another or a lack thereof is what creates tension and stress. It’s not the environment hotel or your home; its a deep awareness that’s either missing or appreciated.
As a tenured travel professional, I’ve had the great fortune to speak with hundreds upon hundreds of travelers. Many shared highly-personal information. They divulged feelings of being misunderstood and taken for granted. Traveling in their minds-eye, was a time of exploration, but they would confide in me their spouse just wanted to sit by the pool, read a book, or stay within two blocks of the hotel. Others would speak of being dismissed, and being led from one place to another; exhausted by it all.
Personality Traits Packed for a Vacation or Unpacked during a Quarantine
There’s an underlying theme here, regardless of the environment. It’s focused on understanding your personality type, your spouses, and your children, too. Why do so many of us fall in love with a person who has opposite personality traits? A few instances of why we fell in love and how the feelings of excitement progress:
- A partner who makes their spouse the center of their universe becomes smothering,
- The giver who’s now taken for granted, the give is assumed,
- The confident take charge spouse is now seen as controlling and dismissive,
- A mysterious lover, who’s quiet and contemplating ⏤ you now want them to speak up and get their head out of the clouds,
- You fell in love with a lively, enthusiastic, and entertaining spouse ⏤ now you wish they didn’t always have to be the center of attention.
Successful Relationships Will Always Bring Challenging Moments
Successful relationships will always bring challenging moments, and hopefully accountability, and acceptance. These things occur as you move to expansion and strive for the best feeling in any given situation. Yes, this is damn hard, especially when your partner is irritating the crap out of you. But it’s in these moments that shifts can occur. This is where you either blame them (co-dependency) for all your problems, or you step back and realize they’ve ignited a personality trigger, yours or theirs. Think of these triggers as essential seeds planted to help grow your self-awareness. You have a choice. You can choose your authentic self, which is the harder choice. Or you can continue to be the pleaser, drama queen, aggressor, the angry one, or play the avoidance game, altogether. The latter are ego-conditioned aspects of self. Which don’t build loving relationships, in fact, that typically initiate failed relationships?
I realize there are times when you’re looking at your partner’s issues square in the face. A partner who you feel needs to take responsibility for their personal reality. But do you agree, you can’t change a person? While controlling and bossing them around, never works long-term, and it’s not healthy? What you can shift is how you step into the moment. Are you raising your energy level to a better, more loving space? Either you’re both vibrating at a higher level, or not. The vibrational frequency doesn’t matter, because the Divine will bring you what you ask.
“Give Yourself the Love You Seek, and the Universe will Send People Who Match it.”Abraham Hicks
The Why’s Behind the Stress
What was once thought of as the exciting aspect of a relationship, is actually an opposite personality function. For many couples, the excitement has been replaced with frustration. Having opposite traits is a great gift from the Divine because as a couple we become a wiser whole.
On the other hand, we’re naturally attracted to our opposites as they are subconscious aspects of ourselves that recognize the need to heal and improve. Opposite traits reside on either end of a spectrum function. Dealing with these opposite functions in an intimate relationship creates challenging situations and communication barriers that need to be resolved. This is where the work starts. And please don’t look at your marriage as if it was a Disney movie full of fairytales and magic. It takes courage to open yourself up. An awareness arises that shows you, you’re responsible for the role you play in your relationship; both the good and bad. Relationship growth usually progresses as a result of a struggle. This is the place where you evolve, find your truth, and transform. The authentic you emerge.
When you Unpack Your Personality™️ (#UYP), you may open the door to a profound new awareness about your partner, while often launching an intimate journey to self. I hope that you view opposing traits, not as a frustration, something to be handled or changed, but as a newfound appreciation of each another. Additionally, recognizing another’s attributes can release new desires. These desires can reveal hidden possibilities and opportunities to spark relationship transformations.
How exciting for you both!
An understanding of each other’s travel traits can elevate relationships. A mundane partnership can change into a magical, enriching, and meaningful one. OK there is some Pixy dust here. 😏 It can even take on spiritual qualities, helping You and YOUR partner embrace conscious coupling. Remember, it always starts with baby steps.
How to Love More and Stress Less During Quarantine
Wrap Up. How to love more and stress less during quarantine is intended for couples who wish to fully explore their personality type and are eager to add-in a spiritual practice. Getting to know your personality and your spouse’s personality in all its perfectly-imperfect ways, backed with a spiritual or faith practice will bring about a relationship that will truly stand the test of time. You’ll both be stronger, wiser, and happier!
It’s Always My Intention
It’s always my intention to help you realize different aspects of yourself. To inspire you to show up in the world better than you were the day before. Every day is a gift. You are a gift, with great potential. That’s why the Universe assigned you a distinct personality type and embellished your soul with your own brilliant DNA blueprint. You’re here to remember and share your beautiful self with the world. We are all different. After a ten-year tsunami, and years of reflection and learning, I now know on a soul level, that spirituality doesn’t come in a pre-labeled box. It comes from your higher self, obvious right. What many don’t realize is your personality dictates your spiritual approach to life. Just like it dictates, your travel style, your lifestyle, and your career.
My radio interview aired on Speaking of Travel part of the iHeart radio network with host, Marilyn Ball. Give it a listen here. I’m also working on 16 guidebooks on the subject matter of Unpacking Your Personality.™️ It’s a modern-day approach to personality typing supported by spirituality. I’m working on finishing up the books, and will then need to get a printer, develop a Podcast, and so much more. All new things for me, but I’m excited, exhausted and a bit overwhelmed. 😇 I look forward to building a community of seekers—individuals who want to know their truth and shine brighter in the world. We will become a positive force in the world. And I’m up for whatever it takes to make this happen.